DC Member Group Draws Core Lessons from Work with L’Arche

Over 40 million U.S. adults say they have no close friends. One in four people with intellectual disabilities don’t have a single friend. Research indicates that adults in the general population have 125 people in their social networks, whereas adults with intellectual disabilities have 3.1 people in their social networks who are not paid to be with them. Many adults with disabilities live their days in profound isolation.

Recently, L'Arche, a worldwide organization that creates communities where people with and without intellectual disabilities live and work together, released a video, “Loneliness Isn’t Inevitable,” featuring several of their "core family members" talking about loneliness and how they overcome it. L’Arche group homes expand the notion of care for core members to include celebrating and making known the unique gifts of every person. This places L'Arche's competent caregiving in a larger context.

During the Covid shutdown, a group at Holy Trinity parish in Washington, DC started working with two L'Arche homes in the DC area. Recently, they began bringing dinner and sharing it with the residents. After hosting the dinner pictured above in June, Rich Landfield, KM, reported that while the residents appreciated the good food, the more important aspect of the meal was socializing with the Malta members. These interactions had an impact on everyone sharing the meal, and greater relationships resulted.

A few months ago, Shep Abel, GCMOb, spoke to the Holy Trinity parish group about "Lessons Learned from L'Arche." His first lesson was that interactions with core members taught him that he too was poor, vulnerable and had weaknesses. As a result, he focused on just being with L'Arche family members because that seemed more important than doing something for them. Shep recommended just being with these individuals as one who has disabilities and vulnerabilities in common with them. The next lesson that Shep focused on was to listen without judging. This takes time and a change in the tendency to steer conversations toward one's own view. Instead, he urged inviting the L'Arche core members into the center of attention and accompanying them as an attentive listener.

The lessons that Shep shared are models for us to adopt in Lourdes and in other works of the Order. You can read the full text of Shep's comments on serving at L'Arche by clicking here.